On Sunday, 9 days after the transplant surgery, a flicker of light went on in my body-mind and I began to feel just a little bit better.
Until that point, I felt like my body was hanging on, trying to adjust to the massive, seismic shifts that come with having the largest organ in the body removed and then replaced with a foreign object (the new liver) and force fed a cornucopia of medications; not to mention trying to cope with 15 extra kilos of water weight water weight that had oozed on to the body, an affect from major surgery. My body was freaking out, my mind exhausted from all the processing.
By Sunday I started walking around the ward, 6 kilos of the water weight had come off (though my skin is actually leaking as I write) and Monday I was taken to the shower for a scrub. Reborn.
Last week, even through the pain, I was so blindlessly grateful, and now even as I feel more coherent with awareness returning in my body, I truly believe that I have been lifted by the angels of the universe as I take flight into knowing – knowing who I am, why I am here on this earth and what I can do. It’s as if I literally have been given this tremendous side glance into the universal stratosphere and have seen love bending over the arc of an angel’s wing from a divine source of light.
I am positive that this miracle of love and life has been gifted to me by all the devoted healing energy generated by You; anyone and everyone out there who has held a flame for my being throughout these last long months.
The light of love. The most joyous, sacred power that we all have is the potential to manifest this gift for others every single day we are in a body –Pow!
I have felt present in receiving it. I also sense a great responsibility to keep this force afloat.
Things have a magical way of working out, always, through surrender. That is the key; we can’t control it. This great source of angel energy is a way of reconnecting in to our inner magic by way of devotion. When we give up our life’s energy to another divine being, we too are touched by this radiant light of faith; we can manifest it and reflect luminosity and love through eternity.
I suppose for me, this is now how I come to understand the meaning of God’s Grace. We are all potential angels whom carry one another, we are love! Isvara pranidhanad va. Jai!
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